17 September 2006

getting help (aka friendship)

it is incredibly difficult to ask for help, favours, or tasks from friends, I find. and of course if someone asks me for something I'm happy to be needed, happy to help, glad that I was the one that the person turned to. but one can't assume that of others, right? I generally assume they're thinking: sheesh! yet another favour! can't the girl do anything for herself? and it generally seems that when I ask for something the favour balance-sheet in my head is generally along the lines of: huge debt in my column, huge positive in theirs = I can't ask them for something more!

and so, we find ourselves moving into a new house and depending on others, perhaps more than normal, as we are car-less and have some difficulty navigating around here. it's normal to need stuff when you move, but this time it seems a bit more widespread than normal:

--Sam's parents had not only to get up in the middle of the night to send our dog to us. they had to say goodbye to Luke, whom they'd been taking care of for a year. for us.
--friends here in Swansea have driven us around to no end and continue to say, as they drop us off: just let me know if you need another lift
--a friend here, on 30-minutes' notice, came by our flat, helped us move our stuff out with his car, and stored it in his garage for the month we were gone.
--one of our new neighbours graciously agreed to have the courier deliver our television mount to her door, and then in the midst of my awkward introductions of myself and Sam, offered to loan us their truck on the weekends if we needed it.
--our friends in Redlands have met the charity folks to pick up things from our storage unit in the 110-degree heat, then returned to meet the estimator person, and still are on-board for meeting the movers and getting our stuff on its way to us.

and this is just the recent stuff.

I suppose this is just a shout-out to the global-level friendships, both those involving incredible favours and those not currently in that category. I've come to think of this generosity as a karmic balance in the universe. I may not be able to return the favour to that particular person. but perhaps whatever generosity I can offer goes out into the world and adds to the pool of generous action, potentially returning to me in some unexpected, incredibly helpful form.

many many thanks.

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